How long have you been walking this path of grief? My Daniel died 19 months ago. I thought I had reached the point where the pain was no longer a sharp knife cutting out my heart. It is more of a dull ache like pain in a spot that seems unable to be soothed. However, today I found out it is a wound that has not healed. It is just scabbed over, and fragile. It can be ripped open by some seemingly insignificant thing and cause a wave of sharp pain to pour through me.
I am packing up things, in order to make a move. I felt like I should go through the things in Daniel's dresser drawers. Sorting out things we wanted to keep etc.... My grand daughter was helping me. As she went through the items she handed me a pair of glasses. They were not in a case. Just glasses laying in the drawer. FLASHBACK! All of a sudden I was seeing Daniel laying there on the floor. The paramedics had laid his glasses up on that dresser and someone had placed them in that drawer. Oh the pain of loss that swept through me. I had to stop sorting. I told my grand daughter that we would have to do this another day.
If you are new to this walk of grief, your pain of loss is still fresh and sharp. There will come a day when it is bearable. I am not sure it will ever go away completely. It seems that when you least
expect it, something will come along causeing it to raise up anew and afresh. I have wonderful memories of Daniel. I try to keep these alive in my mind and heart. I talk about him. Recalling good times and funny things that happened to us. I do not think it is good for us to dwell on those terrible last moments of the death. I want to dwell on knowing that he is with the Lord. That he is well. That he is at peace. That he has a new body, not the broken one that he left behind.
Hang in there my friend. This too shall pass. Go to the Lord and ask Him to give you strength for each day. He has been doing that for me for a long time now.
I am packing up things, in order to make a move. I felt like I should go through the things in Daniel's dresser drawers. Sorting out things we wanted to keep etc.... My grand daughter was helping me. As she went through the items she handed me a pair of glasses. They were not in a case. Just glasses laying in the drawer. FLASHBACK! All of a sudden I was seeing Daniel laying there on the floor. The paramedics had laid his glasses up on that dresser and someone had placed them in that drawer. Oh the pain of loss that swept through me. I had to stop sorting. I told my grand daughter that we would have to do this another day.
If you are new to this walk of grief, your pain of loss is still fresh and sharp. There will come a day when it is bearable. I am not sure it will ever go away completely. It seems that when you least
expect it, something will come along causeing it to raise up anew and afresh. I have wonderful memories of Daniel. I try to keep these alive in my mind and heart. I talk about him. Recalling good times and funny things that happened to us. I do not think it is good for us to dwell on those terrible last moments of the death. I want to dwell on knowing that he is with the Lord. That he is well. That he is at peace. That he has a new body, not the broken one that he left behind.
Hang in there my friend. This too shall pass. Go to the Lord and ask Him to give you strength for each day. He has been doing that for me for a long time now.
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